The Por Favor Podcast Anti-Weasel Guide to Walt Disney World

Hi folks! We’re Gary and Mike, the co-hosts of the Por Favor Podcast. If you’ve heard us you know that we don’t take things too seriously (except beer, and food, and Disney, and sports, and well…never mind).

Anyway, Lisa has asked us to write an article for her blog while she jet-sets across the globe. She said it’d be a great way to cross-promote our podcast, but I have a feeling she’s just trying to get some free labor out of the deal.

One of the things that we frequently talk about on our podcast, is our love/hate relationship (ok, mostly hate) with the Walt Disney World Weasels. In case you don’t know what a Walt Disney World Weasel is, we can define it for you:

1. Any person under the age of 16 who runs roughshod throughout a Disney Park
2. The parent/guardian of any such person listed in definition #1
3. Someone who tries to game the Disney system (i.e. line cutting)
4. Someone who stops, without notice, in the middle of a crowded walkway
5. Someone who uses their darned iPad to take photos/video of the parades and fireworks!

Let’s be clear here, we understand these things happen on a trip to Walt Disney World, and someone can be a Walt Disney World Weasel and still be a good person, but if you frequently fall into one of these categories, then you probably want to stop reading this post! Here is the Official Por Favor Podcast Guide to Avoiding Walt Disney World Weasels©.

Step 1:

If you want to avoid the Walt Disney World Weasels, one of the easiest ways to do so is by avoiding the parks entirely. This piece of advice is not great. We love the parks. So let’s amend this step and say, go late and stay late. If you show up to the park at 11am and stay until 6pm, you are in weasel central. After the little ones are all tuckered out, it’s your chance to have your run of the place. Plan on staying until (after) closing and take advantage of the weaning weasel hours.

Step 2:

Avoid character meals like the plague. If you are looking for Walt Disney World Weasel central, look no further than a character meal. This is the time where the group in definition 1 and 2 are most prominent. Little weasels running around a crowded restaurant like they just free-based pixie sticks and their weasel parents sitting back with a cocktail updating their Facebook status so their friends back home can be jealous. Let’s be clear, if you want a picture with Chef Mickey, there will be weasel blood on your hands to do so. Fair warning!

Step 3:

Stay at Coronado Springs Resort. This resort has been certified by the Por Favor Podcast as the least likely resort on property to encounter a weasel. It has everything going for it to repel weaseldom. It is sprawling, it is not overly Disney-fied and it is relatively far from all of the parks. Plus, if you are looking for a resort with some very comfy beds and beautiful scenery and landscaping, this resort is for you!

Step 4:

Hang out in World Showcase as much as possible. We know EPCOT Center is not the most kid-friendly park (so they say) so in general, the weasel ratio is much lower here as is. Plus, it’s huge, lots of open spaces to avoid the weasel parents texting while operating a stroller. But, World Showcase is the place to be. Not only do you have the advantage of the best food options in any park, but you have the ever-famous drinking-around-the-world to partake in (note: you run the risk of becoming a weasel if you aren’t careful in your drink consumption). We say get to World Showcase at 11am when it opens and take your time looking in all the countries. Grab a snack, meal or drink in each country and really spend some time in the least weasel-friendly locations like; Morocco, Canada, Germany and China. Editors note: Step 4 will become null and void once Frozen takes over Norway (yuck).

Step 5:

Resort hop. This is a great way to see parts of the Walt Disney World property that you probably haven’t experienced before. Instead of rushing right into the Magic Kingdom, take a resort launch to the Wilderness Lodge and check out their amazing lobby. Hop on the monorail and walk around the impeccable grounds of the Grand Floridian. Before heading into World Showcase, use the back exit and walk along the Boardwalk, an homage to a seaside resort town. Take the bus to Animal Kingdom lodge and soak in the atmosphere at one of the most beautiful places you’ll ever see! Don’t be afraid to explore each resort and see what they have to offer. The benefits are two-fold, while you are expanding your resort horizons, all the weasels are in line to meet Ana and Elsa, so they’ll be out of your hair and you might even find a new resort to call home!

So there you have it folks. Five easy steps to avoid the dreaded Walt Disney World Weasels. If you follow these simple steps you should easily lower your weasel encounter-counter for your next trip to Walt Disney World! Thanks!

Gary Arruda & Mike Hurley

www.porfavorpodcast.com

@PorFavorPodcast on Twitter.com

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