What it’s Like to be Married to the Same Person for 28 Years

Today’s our 28th wedding anniversary!  We’ve left the kids, the dog (and the rest of the menagerie) and have chosen to celebrate this special occasion by ourselves.  Alone.  Just the two of us.  While we won’t be taking that cruise we’d been so looking forward to, we decided a weekend getaway was definitely in order.     

Back in 2014, we celebrated our 25th anniversary at Disney World and wore our celebration buttons for a couple of days.  The reaction from other park guests and some cast members was both hilarious and sometimes a bit alarming.  Quite a few people were amazed that we’d managed to stay married to each other for so long.  One guy commented, “I’ve been married three times and added together I haven’t been married 25 years!”.  Several folks asked us for the secret to staying happily married.  I would share the secret with you now if I had one.  Jokingly, I usually claim our relationship success is based on two rules:  Don’t share money and don’t share a bathroom.  In reality, there is no secret.

I’ve often worried that Raymond and I have given Megan and Joseph unrealistic expectations about marriage.  We know that not all marriages are as harmonious as ours.  We honestly enjoy each other’s company and being together at the end of the day makes our home our happiest place on earth.  It also makes “home” wherever we are.  We rarely disagree, although we do get on each others’ nerves from time to time.  We’re in sync with each other in a way I cannot describe and after all these years, it’s taught me one important lesson that we’ve tried to pass on to our children.  I have this theory…

What it’s Like to be Married to the Same Person for 28 Years

There’s only one reason to get married and love is (mostly) not it.  Alone, love is not enough.  The best and most important reason to get married and stay married is that together you are better than you could ever be individually.  You bring out the best in each other.  You are each other’s biggest fan.  Together you are a super-power that minimizes individual weaknesses and vulnerabilities while maximizing strengths.  You not only compliment each other, you make each other want to be the best versions of yourselves in order to achieve dreams, reach goals (individually and together), and be happy. 

We’ve stressed to Megan and Joseph that while Raymond and I are very happy together, it is never up to any other person in the world to make you happy.  YOU are responsible for your own happiness.  I absolutely do not mean in a selfish way, but I believe you must love yourself in order to be lovable.  There’s no place in a healthy relationship for pettiness, insecurity, or jealousy.  In the long-term, it’s not up to another human being to fix you or prop you up or compensate for your personal issues (no matter how much they love you and want to help).  That’s too big a burden to place on anyone and is completely unfair to that person.

When the person you love makes you want to constantly grow, learn, strive, and reach for the very best YOU – and is there to cheer you on along the way – that, I think is the best way for me to describe what it’s like to be married to the same person for 28 years.

I love you, Raymond.  Thank you for being with me for each and every one of the past 10,227 days.  Happy Anniversary.

 

 

Hurricanes, Disney Vacations, and Perspective

I’ve been obsessively watching Hurricane Irma for over a week.  On Saturday, I spent my time doing laundry and watching the Weather Channel, checking NOAA online, and watching for news on my Facebook feed from folks closer to the situation than I was.  On Sunday, I stopped packing for vacation.  On Wednesday evening at 7:30, Disney Cruise Line cancelled our trip.  While we honestly appreciate their caution and concern for guest safety, the disappointment was…well, you can imagine.

From Disney Cruise Line’s website:

“The September 9 sailing of the Disney Fantasy is cancelled. Refunds will automatically be processed back to the original form of payment used for the cruise booking. Guests are invited to book a future cruise at a 25 percent discount by calling us at 1-855-347-2784 or 407-566-7054 from September 18, 2017, through October 18, 2017. 

While we always strive to deliver magical cruise vacations, nothing is more important to us than providing a safe experience for our guests and crew. We will continue to closely monitor Hurricane Irma and provide updates as necessary.”

Hurricanes, Disney Vacations, and Perspective

As I was wallowing in self-pity over the Disney cruise we won’t be taking on Saturday, I realized that mixed in with the sadness and disappointment was also relief.  We will be safe and sound as Irma barrels along on her course of mayhem and destruction.  While riding out Hurricane Matthew at Disney World last year was an adventure, it’s not one I’d care to repeat.Hurricane Matthew at Walt Disney World

To all my Florida friends – I’m sorry you’ll be dealing with the potential havoc brought by a powerful and unpredictable force of nature.  I’ve been praying steadily for your safety and Irma’s demise.  Having lived in Louisiana for almost 30 years, I well know the worry and helplessness that comes with not being able to control or anticipate what might happen when your home is in the path of a hurricane.  I’m sorry you’re dealing with that now.

As you are hoping for the best and preparing for the worst, please know that you’ll continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.  Through the Living a Disney Life blog and on social media, I’ve gotten to know so many of you and your friendship means a great deal to me!

Be safe and take care, Disney friends.  Please let me know how you’re doing…Lisa

Looking Forward to Sailing Aboard the Fantasy

Our last Disney cruise was in February, 2016 on the Dream.  It was a short, four-night trip to Nassau and Castaway Cay.  I was recovering from the Glass Slipper Challenge and it was the perfect cruise for lots of rest and relaxation with a bit of recreation thrown in for fun.  We enjoyed both dinner and brunch at Remy, dinner at Palo, did the Midship Detective Agency activity, ran the Castaway Cay 5K and skipped Nassau altogether.  Before the ship returned to Port Canaveral, we’d booked anther cruise and the time to sail has nearly arrived!

Looking Forward to Sailing Aboard the Fantasy

Since the Dream and the Fantasy are so similar, we feel like we know what to expect in general.  However, two of the Fantasy’s MDRs (Main Dining Rooms) are uncharted territory for us.  We’re excited to try the Enchanted Garden and Royal Court restaurants – we missed the Enchanted Garden on the Dream due to other dinner plans that night.  I expect Animator’s Palate to be pretty much as it is the other ships. Since we’re old and set in our ways, we requested the early dinner seating.  We prefer dinner before the evening show rather than the other way around.  We also like to turn in fairly early and don’t want to feel like we’re going to sleep on full bellies.   We love the adults-only dining options on Disney cruises.  We’re skipping Remy this time, but have booked both dinner and brunch at Palo.  Remy is fantastic and I highly recommend it, but we’re spending a chunk of our travel budget on excursions this time around and Remy didn’t make the cut, financially speaking.

Our plans by day…

Embarkation Day – We want to kick off the trip by relaxing.  We do have an afternoon meet-up planned with the Facebook group we joined for this trip.  After that and the lifeboat drill, we’ll try to watch the sail-away party from our favorite spot on the upper deck.

Sunday – Day at Sea, Formal Night, dinner at Palo.  We LOVE the fitness center and will certainly visit it this day.  If there’s a spin class offered, we’ll try to make it.  The spin instructors are always great, it’s a good workout, and bonus!  No extra charge involved!  We have a Chocolate and Liquor tasting booked in the afternoon.  This will be new to us.  We tried to book it on the Dream, but had no luck…the tasting was already at full capacity. 

Monday – Day at Sea, Halloween on the High Seas theme, Dinner in our assigned dining room.  Depending on the schedule, we’ll try to catch a movie and also see if we can attend a cooking demonstration of some type.  Those are two of our favorite activities on at-sea days.  Rather than worry with costumes, I bought us a couple of Nightmare Before Christmas-themed shirts to wear this day.  That way we’ll still feel like we’re participating, but won’t have to pack lots of extra stuff.

Tuesday – Tortola and the Wreck and Reef Dive excursion.  This is also Pirate night.  I expect we’ll be exhausted from our adventure, but I would love to make it to the deck party.

Wednesday – St. Thomas Certified Scuba excursion.  No special theme for dinner – I’m sure we’ll turn in early…really early.  By this time on previous cruises, I’ve been known to fall asleep during the evening’s show.  I know I can sleep in the next morning, but I’ve never been good at shaking off being sleepy.

Thursday – Day at Sea.  Brunch at Palo then Raymond has an afternoon massage scheduled at the spa (birthday gift from me).  Hopefully, there will be more movies and/or cooking demos to see!  This should be semi-formal night and we’ll be in whatever dining room is on our rotation. Friday – Castaway Cay!  As of now, we’re planning on doing the 5K before relaxing at Serenity Bay for a while.  We like the 5K because it’s very low-key and is a fun way to burn off some of those cruise calories.  Castaway Cay's Mt. RustmoreAfter lunch we have the “Abaco Rigid Hull Snorkeling Adventure – Adult Only” excursion.  We’ve done this one before back in 2010 and we saw some awesome sea creatures and plant life.  We’ll probably head back to the ship fairly early so we can start getting our suitcases packed.  So sad!  We haven’t even left yet, and here I am talking about the entire trip being over.  If you’ve been on a Disney cruise before, you know how bittersweet that last night can be!

Now there’s still the unresolved matter of Hurricane Irma.  Will she crash our vacation?  Will she move on before we arrive?  Will she maybe force us on an alternate itinerary?  Only time will tell.  No matter what, like every Disney vacation we’ve taken – this one’s bound to be an adventure!

Disney Vacation – Next Week!

My plans for Labor Day Weekend involve packing!  We’ll be off to Orlando next Friday and sail from Port Canaveral on Saturday.  Right now we’ve got our eyes on Hurricane Irma and are hoping she moves right on along before the Fantasy sets sail.

Disney Vacation – Next Week!

We’re staying pre-cruise near the airport.  Since we have already booked three more visits to Disney World during the next 8 months, we don’t have the DVC points to spare for one night.  We’ve stayed at this hotel before another cruise and it worked out well.  Initially, we thought we’d just hang out at the hotel and be well rested and ready to go on Saturday.  Ha!  No way could we be that close to Disney World and stay away.  Plus, there’s that new promotion for DVC members that offers a 30% discount at certain restaurants for dining before 6:30 pm or after 8:30 pm (through September 30th).

Our plane lands around noon and once we’ve gotten our luggage and checked into the hotel, we’ll be taking some form of transportation to Animal Kingdom. (We are still undecided what to use, suggestions welcome!).

Of course we couldn’t get a FastPass for Flight of Passage, but Raymond will still get to explore Pandora for the first time.  Our afternoon consists of Asia first – FastPass for Expedition Everest.  Pandora second – FastPass for Na’vi River Journey.  Finally, we’ll use our last FastPass for Kilimanjaro Safaris in Africa.  Between FastPasses, we’ll have time to wander at our leisure.  I’m certain we’ll make a stop at the Dawa Bar for a refreshment.  Once we finish the safari, it’ll be time to go.

We’ll be wrapping up the evening with an early dinner (6:00 pm) at Jiko.  We love that place!  Eating early to take advantage of the special discount will give us plenty of time to relax and enjoy our dinner without rushing.  By 8:00, we should be ready to head back to our hotel and call it a day.  The next morning we’ll be on our way to our first sailing on the Disney Fantasy.

I’ll be taking tons of pictures and will have much to report when we get home.  Our Eastern Caribbean itinerary should look like this (Irma, be gone!):

Day Port Ashore Onboard
1 Port Canaveral, Florida 3:45 PM
2 At Sea
3 At Sea
4 Tortola, British Virgin Islands 7:30 AM 5:45 PM
5 St. Thomas/St. John, US Virgin Islands 7:45 AM 4:00 PM
6 At Sea
7 Disney Castaway Cay 9:30 AM 4:45 PM
8 Port Canaveral, Florida 7:30 AM

Tomorrow I’ll be back with the details of our port excursions, dining plans and all we’re looking forward to on this trip!

Have you sailed on the Fantasy?  What did you enjoy the most?